Marc Chervin shot a one under par 70 to win the A-Flight with partner George Massar with a team score of 60. Per Marc, it wasn't one of my better days. I was a little tired and felt like taking a nap. I even had to walk on water to help George find his ball on the other side. George was asked the whereabouts of his regular playing partner Earl. Per George, Earl who?

B-Flight Ben Cartago / Harley Cogswell shot 57, nothing interesting.

Luis Armenta and John Keller shot a team 57 to take the C-Flight. Per Luis, "I had to stay focused because my partner was distracted by the noisy team we played against, and most of my shots were spectacular mainly due to my natural abilities, unlike my partner who admires me in a hero worship kind of way."

Other Winners – Ben / Harley won the side action; borringgg.

Straightest Drive Hole #7 = Todd Doty
Longest Drive Women #9 = Dee Thompson
Longest Drive Men # 16 = Tafuna
Closest to Pin...#3 = Denny Andrew
.........................#5 = Matt Neil
.........................#12 = Harley
.........................#15 = Ellen Nibali
Longest Putts = Bob Shobert, John Keller, Jim Enia, Tafuna, Dan Fouts, Andy Christie
Tafuna (new member) smashed a long drive that still hasn't landed.
Dee Thompson's won the ladies long drive when her shot hit a tree, hit another tree, ricochet off a pigeon's butt cheek and landed in the fairway.

Don't forget our next tournament is November 19th at Johnson Ranch. This will be our last tournament in 2005 and the next after that is February 2006.

19th Hole:

Ed and Denny who shot a team score of 58 and had the side action already spent, were like fat cats who just ate the canary. Then Ben and Harley came in with a score of 57 and "bam", Ed and Denny looked like they ate crow. Per Denny, I'm praying hard for somebody to come in with a 56.

Paul Thomforde said the he was very impressed with Dee Thompson who didn't cuss or throw any clubs or PMS tantrums. She was very professional. Dee answered back saying that Paul's drives only goes as far as the ladies tee box and it wasn't safe out there. On the other hand Kip Deist his partner was hitting miracle shots all day.

Club members showed restraint by not mobbing famous quarterback Dan Fouts and asking for autographs. But, when Harley threw him a sleeve of balls (perfect spiral) for winning the longest putt he dropped it big time. There were raised eye brows, but then all remembered that Dan was a quarterback and not a receiver.

The teams of Hal Nurkka, Bob Kohl, Stewart Bates, and Paul Ruth had their fingers crossed and hung in there hoping for a win. Sure enough one of their teams did win and it was last place. Per Hal, winning is better than nothing any day. Also, look out because we're going to kick butt next tournament.

Hat's off to Stonecreek's Event Manager Bill Sobbing for their professional conduct and customer friendly services. This was definitely one of our best tournaments. If you weren't there, you missed a great time. The course was in great shape and everybody said that the burgers and sandwiches after the tournament tasted good.

Another factor that added to the success of this tournament is Jenny Tobin. She said there is no reason why the final scores should take long to calculate and post and she backed her statement to the hilt. The scores were on the sheets and the winners announced and paid as club members were still ordering food and drinks. Denny Andrew and Phil Carlyle also stepped up to assist Jenny in this endeavor. Great Job Team!

Fellow golfers, sign up early for our next tournament at Johnson Ranch on November 19th. This will be our 2005 yearend tournament until we start up again in February 2006.

Thank You and God Bless. Ed.

Extra News Bulletin:

Desert Vista High School (Thunder) football team is on a roll as they beat the Corona High Aztecs 14 to 7 on Friday Oct. 16. Also, Friday Oct. 21st beat an excellent Yuma High (Kings) team 58 to 0. Hero's in the Corona game included senior Edward Anderson who intercepted 2 passes and caused and recovered a fumble on the Aztecs 15 yard line to set up the Thunder's winning touchdown.

Obviously the Thunder's success is due mainly to Edward's dad Edward T. Anderson Sr. who coaches the team from the stands. Yes folks, you can hear President Ed every Friday night yelling instructions to the team.

Per Ben, I saved five bucks just hanging out in the parking lot and listening to Ed instead of buying a ticket to the game. I got all the play by play action and he yells at the other parent for being bad coaches and calling bad plays. Keep on keeping on coach.

Dear Sam,
Please re-iterate the clubs number one rule to your members. My husband plays every month in your tournaments and he hasn't been following the number one rule. I haven't gotten my four hours in a very, very, very long time. What can I do, can he be penalized or something?
Signed, Golf Widow.

Dear Widow,
The club's number one rule is thus: At the end of every club tournament, all members must go home and have wild sex with their loved one for four hours. The number one rule was implemented to promote family unity and golf. The Annual Partee club has grown since the number one rule mainly due to the support we get from the one we love. We are a very unique club because of the number one rule. The penalty for failure to obey the number one rule is, you get kicked out of the club and can't play in any of our tournaments. For all new members, please follow the rule or else.

Dear Sam,
I feel hurt that my teammate is bad mouthing me every time we don't win. I don't have to be a blond with big poops to know that being good comes from being great after you overcome all the stuff everybody talks about. Also, I broke a nail the last time and that made me mad.
Signed, Mad

Dear Karen,
I'm not going to repeat all the stuff Dee's been saying about you, but she said she's sorry and for you to quit your bitching and get over it.

Dear Sam,
The winning scores were kind of low. Are you sure that everybody counts their strokes. I still have my doubts.
Signed, Doubting

Dear Doubting,
I believe that club members count every stroke. But that's like saying that all the men can count to accurately to 21 in the nude.